Rich Morris' Comics - YAFGC and The ComixBlog

Mr.Brandy likes trees. He has them for supper.
-FNG



Uh.... no. Sorry. I like my slaves to have certain qualities to them that you, sadly, lack. One of those is existance in this world. You'll agree that's a very important aspect. So dream on. It's not going to happen.
-Arachne.



*cough* - *choke* QUEEN? Of the DROW? ME? HAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAH, ahahahahahahaahahahahhhahah. No. That's a stupid job. Better to keep the influence high and the profile low. That's the secret to TRUE power.
-Arachne.

Chimera (@ Lion): How do you deal with your more impatient Goat head?

Capt'n Fang: Is this banana cake any good? it has pinecones in.

Hello, I'm posting for the first time. Thanks for a great comic and a lot of laughs so far.

@ Wolf

Hello, nice to see that you're free again. I'd like to know what you would do if you ever meet "Caduga" again, assuming that you would recognise her.

@ Glon

Good to see that you helped out Wolf. Don't worry, I don't think he plans to thank you in any "special" way. Please be careful about your hands and grab a pair of armored gauntlets!

@ Arachne

Did you ever have problems with escaping prisoners? While you seem pretty effective in keeping mundanes I wonder what you would do about people or monsters with supernatural abilities like teleport or shapechanging?

@ Captain Fang

Is the summer cold in Limbo? Slaadi are yummy with anything.

So, Wolf, do you plan to thank Glon in that "special way"? I mean, he did arrange for your freedom, and I think that means he cherishes ...fond memories. What do you think?

Alright there, Jone! Fancy a tune while you're working at the smithy? *strums electric lute*

- Crumpos

Eh? Oh! Hyuk! He's not so bad once you get to know him. I've grown really attached to the guy! Sure he can be a bit of a crab sometimes....

I heard that. I wouldn't be nearly so imatient with you if you would occasionally try to be more cooperative and less impulsive.

Aw Goat, you're always going on about that. I don't even know what it means.

You should, I explain it every time!

But it's complicated!

Hith.
-Chimera



Wibble.
-FNG



My pleasure! Thank you very much. Welcome to the forum, sorry it's taken me a while to get back to this thread, but life sometimes...well, y'know.
-BK



Caduga....*sigh* Oh, I would know those eyes...her hair, her smell... and what would I do? I would do what any Drow man does when in the company of a Drow woman. Obey.
-Wolf



Yeah yeah. Wiseass.
-(HRH) Glon Bloodhand



Nah, I'm usually pretty careful about how I store them. Right equipment for the right job, y'know? And of course there's always one or two slippery eels who wriggle out of your grip, but what can you do? I know Drostardy was an inside job, though, and if I ever figure out who it was who sprang him.... they're going to wish they'd never pulled one over on Arachne, let me tell you!
-Arachne



The grass is green because of the turnips I ate. It comes out all furry.
-FNG



I don't think that would do either of us any good. Glon isn't exactly a rung on my social ladder and I'm not exactly a flower in his bouquet, if you catch my meaning.
-Wolf




-J

Hmmm… Well there HAVE been a few things I’ve wanted to ask the characters... hmmm...


@ Drow Queen

I’m sorry you didn’t get picked to be the leader of the black mountain (I voted for you!) but I must wonder. What would you have done if you WERE made queen of the mountain?... and why don’t you go to the elf council yourself like the other elven leaders apparently do?


@ All elven leaders in general:

You ever consider interbreeding the elf races to the point of having a child that is one-fith of each elven race? If raised right (possibly by volunteer parents from each elf race) that hybrid-elf could show the future of the elves as a species. You should at least discuss it at the next elf-council.


@ Bob the beholder.

You ever regret the time you spent with those 150 harpies?



@ The harpy sisters

Any chance I could come over sometime and not get eaten?



@ cpt fang

KOBOLD! kobold kobold kobold! kobledkobold koboled koboled? koboled koboled....koboooollled...


@ The beholder king

By any chance are you related to the crazy beholder from the LFG webcomic?


@ Madame white eye

Give me three of the most expensive stuff you got please.

What would *I* have done? I would have lead them all to glory the likes of which have never been seen below the lands and seas of this world. Then would the Drow have become greatest and most revered of all peoples! But no, they wanted a soft-headed hog-snout to lead them. Fools.
And you give too much credit to the Elf Moots. It's an opportunity for us to see what buffoonery our light leeching idiot cousins are up to. Nothing more. I wouldn't waste my personal time. Not anymore.
-HRM Queen of the Drow




You are one SICK little monkey.
-HRM Queen of the High Elves




Uhhhh.. can Gren see this?
-Bob



Ummmm SURE! Yeah, of COURSE you can. Come on up! Yooo hooooo! Why don't you stay for DINNER?
-Nike



Did you smell a shoe? I smelled a shoe. A shoe with mustard.
-FNG



What is an elleffgeewebcomic? I have more important things to worry about. Like the FUTURE of BEHOLDER KIND!
-The Beholder King



Yeah? Come and get it, smart guy. Humans. Sheesh.
-M.WhiteEye, prop.

Sounds like good times. Shame it didn’t happen. ahh well, always next time amirite?




One sick little monkey with big dreams... you could always get someone you hate to do it. ahh well, cant please everyone.




Couldn’t tell ya pal. Sorry.



Awesome! I should be there round Thursday. Look for the tall human with the bright red hair.



The path to true happiness involves a can opener, a frying monkey pan, and one Mr Jacob snowshine. Bring the shoe paste round the house. And squeal like a piggy.



I see. ahh well. Worse comes to worse, you could always just have a few hundred of yourselves flying across human lands blasting everything in your path with your death rays.




I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to offend! i just figured you were in a bit of financial trouble around the bar and could use the business! Please forgive me miss!

Little Drow Girl: What's the name of your adorable little displacer kitten? How'd you get her/him? Did you or your parents trap it yourself, or is there some kind of specialty store or what?

Caudagan: Around how old are you? On one hand, your attitude is very reminiscent of a human teenager, but on the other, you're clearly living on your own... I don't know how elves do those things. Or humans in your mom's culture, come to think of it. Which one of them raised you, anyhow?

Jone: What do you like to do in your free time?

Clover: Is there a Rogue's Guild in Drostardy, or is the country just too dang squeaky-clean for that kind of thing?

Chimera: Exactly what head has control over what part? It seems to be mostly Lion, from what I can tell.

To Alzaer'bith, queen of drow: How is it that you even managed to become queen to begin with? Did you inherit the position, or did you assassinate the previous incumbent? (I realize that since you are a drow, this might be more of an 'and'-type situation than an 'or'... )

To the vampiress Brandi: Seeing as you're a vampire spawn, with all the abilities thereof ... Why haven't you just turned to mist to escape from Arachne's 'playroom'? õ_o

To Lewstrom: So, how are you enjoying your, um, 'extended vacation' in the lower caverns? How are you keeping busy down there? Is your time spent on soul-searching to determine your future, or are you building up your strength so you can return to the caverns without everyone mobbing you and rendering true death unto you?

To captain Fang: ?Siht daer ouy nac - ?Syadawon ot pu uoy era tahw - "Rhubarb".

Dear Caverns Teacher, could you tell me the names of the rest of the young monsters in Yapp's class?

HRM Prince Glon:
Suck it up. Politics and marriage both suck, but if you give them... oh let's say a night a month... you may live to see the crown on your head. At least you get to name your own heir, and don't have to have three of them from those three. Here's a bit of advice: After a night with one of the princesses, flee to your harem and have a mind numbing orgy to blot the previous night out of your head.

HRM Queen Clover:
Congratulations on your royal wedding, and the birth of your son. Aren't you grateful that your sister didn't get it in her head to try to switch places with you?

So how do you balance your royal duties with being the head of the assassins?

HRM King Eric III:
Congratulations on your royal wedding, and the birth of your son. Personally, I am quite amazed that the land generally accepts your mixed marriage, aside from one adviser.

Other than the height difference and fuzzy toes, is there anything you regret?

Turg:
Of all the folks in the land, you have to be my favorite. Set out for what you wanted and got it in one fell swoop. You lucky devil. Any chance we'll be seeing you again in the future?

Wolf:
Realising that life as a male drow has severe downsides, do you have any personal ambitions aside from climbing the sexual ladder?

Charlotte:
Knowing that you're on your way to your own adventures, what plans do you have? I hear that making a topside royal falling in love with you is the perfect way to gain power. Or, would you prefer to hang out in a royal dungeon?

Arachne:
Other than the fact that you personally scare the bejeebus out of most males, are there any plans on forming your own House? If anything, you can terrorize your future children. Oh, as an aside... When making out with a deity, do they like it when you call out their name? Curious minds and all that.

HRM King Lewstrom the VII:
In my personal opinion, you got royally screwed... if you'll pardon the pun. Any chance you'll seek vengeance from that Goddess of Death and take her portfolio (becoming a demigod) any time soon? If anything, you can get your flesh back and have sex when you want.

Chimera:

• Lion: So, when did you first suspect that you didn't like heights? Were you dropped as a cub, or was it something more sinister?
• Goat: Other than having to put up with having the most brains, what's the biggest downside of your condition?
• Dragon: *Scritches Ears*

Lord Richard, Creator of the Realm:
Personal request: Can we see more of the underdarks kiddies?
Those shorts have me in stitches the most. ^_^

-------edit--------

Miss Whiteeye: Personally, I would've turned those leering and stinky humans skulls into tankards by now. I commend your restraint. So tell me, what destructive therapy are you using? I would assume that there's something you take out your frustrations on.

@ Glon. prince of the orcs.

so Glon, buddy. uit must be asked. how good are the wives in bed?


@ the beholder king

just wondering. how do you find time to go around getting the awnsers to theise questions all the time?

Oh, well for a start, you'll find I don't answer them "all the time". In fact, there are times where there will be days or weeks (months?) after people have asked questions that I've gotten around to answering them. Or, perhaps more accurately, I let the characters answer them. It's part of my creative process to let them roam freely in my brain, in a way.